My husband came home last night, after work, to find me sitting on the floor, legs strectched out in front of me, the four year old sitting on one leg and hitting me in the head with a piece of cardboard while the little guy added another sticker to my face. It happens.
Today, I have the whole day to myself. There are, of course, things that need to be done while I'm alone in a blessedly child free home. Don't get me wrong, I love my kids, but - holy crap! - is it nice to have a break sometimes. So, here's the list: laundry, vacuum, clean kitchen, dance around in my pjs, go to the bank, clean the bathroom.
Yes, indeed, "dance around in my pjs" made the list. Usually, I just get right to the list in the vain hope of getting everything done. Today, I decided that if I wanted to do anything fun, I'd have to put it on the list. It had been brought to my attention recently, that perhaps, just maybe, part of the stress I'm feeling is entirely self inflicted. Yes. *head smack* YES!
So, as a gift to my children (and my husband) I'm going to attempt to let go. There is so much that happens with these kids every day that I freak out over. I have never yelled so much in my life as I have since she turned 3. I'm going to take a run at being mellow. It'll be new for me. Although I'm a little ... mmm... control-freaky, I've always been a quiet person, and this yelling thing really makes me sad.
There will still be a list, and there will still be rules, but I'm going to try and let them just *be* sometimes. The world will not end if we are 2 minutes late to something. If someone judges me a bad mum because they're not wearing a coordinated outfit, well, they're probably not someone I'd get along with anyway. If someone thinks it's wrong that my house is not pristine when I've got guests coming over, then don't come over!
Now I just need to convince myself. I'll put it on the list.