Friday, July 29, 2016

Summer So Far.

Her: can I play on the computer?
Me: nope.
Her: can I watch TV then?
Me: nope. You lost screens, remember?
Her: you never said that!
Me: yes, I did *recounts entire conversation during which said child lost screens*

*Five minutes of back and forth about how I never said any of that*

Her: YOU ARE THE MEANEST MOMMY IN THE UNIVERSE, AND YOU'RE LYING, AND YOU DON'T EVEN LOVE ME!! *stomp stomp stomp slam*

Ten minutes later, she sits at the table with a granola bar and a colouring book.

Me: hey dude.
Her: hi.
Me: we cool?
Her: Yep.

*fist bump*


[Repeat, replacing "TV" with whatever it is that I've said they couldn't have (or do) five times already that day.]

How's your summer going?

I used to have time to do this kind of thing.

Thursday, July 14, 2016

Cats For Everyone!

Apparently, I do not make having babies look good. Both my girls, at 8 and 10, have decided that they are not having any babies. Which doesn't mean that they don't want kids, it just means that they don't think they want to go through the work of making and having them. As Beege says, "I don't want to break my vagina." Fair enough.

So where will you be getting these babies then? I asked. Well, we'll adopt some orphans, of course. Who do we call about that, anyway?

So we looked up international adoption in Canada and found a few agencies. We looked through the requirements for adopting in various countries. They were quite surprised to learn that, along with other requirements, adopting can have 3-5 year waiting periods and cost up to $40,000.

"$40,000?" Beege said. "Maybe I'll just have cats. Like... five cats."
"Making them yourself is usually the cheapest way to get a baby, for sure," I agreed.
"Wait a second," Kee interrupted. "Girls can marry girls, right?"
"You bet!"
"Well then, I'll just marry a girl who wants kids, and she can make all the babies."

Problem solved, I guess? We'll save sperm donors and fertility clinics for another discussion. She may end up with cats too.

I've forgiven her for the broken vagina.






Saturday, July 9, 2016

I'm So Tired.

One week down, eight to go. What did we do our first week of summer vacation? A lot of sitting around watching Netflix, actually. Usually, I'd be trying to get them to be more active, maybe read a book or something. But we're still figuring out how things are going to work around here with all of us home all day, and so far it's just super loud.

They did learn something though -- there is a whole bunch of new kids programming to look forward to this summer on Netflix, and they have some recommendations for you.

Beege (10yo) recommends Pokemon because... well, Pokemon,  and Glitter Force for those of you into funny anime and secret superheroes.
 
New episodes streaming as of July 1st!


Kee (8) thinks that everyone should take the time to watch Teen Titans Go! for super heroes and funny stuff, Ever After High (with new episodes starting August 15th!) for fairy tales and funny stuff, and King Julien for totally silly funny stuff. She's kind of into "funny stuff" right now.

Ever After High: Epic Winter streaming August 15th!

As For Husband and myself, he's super excited about Voltron and I'd like an hour or ten to myself so that I can watch the new season of Orange is the New Black.



What are you watching this summer?